Who's the man?

I know some of you expected these to be a bit less serious than they have been. Not all of my blogs will be heart wrenching or thought provoking. Sometimes I take pride in my blatant ignorance.

This week’s window is also called the mirror.

I was looking at the mirror shaving, and getting ready for my usual grooming day. This is the day when I get my haircut, as well as various other grooming practices. However because of these habits I have been called a metro-sexual and even had my sexual preference questioned.

This had led me to wonder who defined what makes a man straight. Is a man straight because he works on cars, has dirty nails, and smells like lawn products? Is a man gay because he uses shea butter soap, wears cologne and gets a facial? The answer to this is no to both.

I grew up in a family full of women. My mother was a model, and the women in my family took great care to groom me into a pretty decent man. However the men in my family all prided themselves on being ladies men, Casanovas or players. I was told what's ok in fashion, how to put colors together and how dirty nails are not a "good look". I've heard women talk about how a man who takes his shirt off and still has a sweater isn't sexy, and body hair is gross. I've heard women talk about how their man smells terrible or his cologne is way too strong. Yet, I can't recall hearing a woman say, "Damn my man is just too clean".

Let's be honest. Men wouldn't do many of the things we do if it weren't for women. Men get dressed, shave and shower because we love women. We look through our closets at what to wear with hopes that we may run into a woman at some point and are ready to "spit hot fire". We've all seen a woman, looked at her then ourselves and wished we'd worn something different so that we would feel comfortable trying to go in.

Now look at the things I just mentioned. If a man does all of these things on a daily basis instead of just one weekends, we come up with names for him. Metro-sexual is a term that was created by dirty, ugly, wack ass men to make well groomed, clean cut, and nice smelling men feel badly about ourselves. I wax my eyebrows. Yes, there I've said it. I don't do it because it feels good. I don't do it because it's fun. I do it because women don't want a man with one damn eyebrow. Bert from Sesame Street was not a mack. In fact I wish people had told me earlier in life about this, then I wouldn't have to go around burning old picture, where I sport my unibrow with pride. (Although, I secretly thank Al B Sure for the few years I had where people thought I did it on purpose.)

In fact one could argue that men who do go the extra mile to keep their "shit tight", only do so because those men love women more than the men who won't put forth that effort. Let's look at the whole "Downlow" phenomenon. Most of us can say we know someone where we've said, "I would have never guessed". That's not the guy who was clean cut, super smooth and suave. It was the guy with the beer belly, dirty shirt and scruffy beard. It was the guy who you saw changing his own oil a few weeks before then.

Sexuality is not a fashion or style. It's not determined based on your color scheme or fashion sense. Regardless of whether you believe it's a decision or in ones DNA, it's not something you can see. Guys remember this; Nino Brown stabbed Christopher Williams because he was a "pretty mf'er". That makes Nino Brown a hater. Nino Brown could have easily asked Christopher Williams to take him shopping and recommend a new barber.